Saturday, 4 September 2010

GOS (Gal pon di Side)

"The gal pon di side juk di best"......"me have me wife inna me yard but me woman outta road ah breed" so many songs seem to glorify the "other woman".

What does it take to be the "other woman" and why does one do it?

I guess there's the obvious scenario, of the chick looking for a sugar daddy, you know her, she doesn't really want to make her own way in life and she's hot why not get "paid" for what she'd be giving up anyway...no she is not a "prossie". I found out that they actually have websites for this sort of arrangement, and the girls will actually specify the amount of "allowance" they expect a month. Interesting.

Then you have the ones who go out of their way to meet this man and make sure they worm their way into his life in whatever way they can. Think that movie "Obsessed" with Beyonce. Once they set their sights on the man, they plan to get him no matter what...these are the ones that may go a little crazy and lie, cheat, steal beat the wife into surrender and move in......seems like a lot of work....Just saying

Then you have the delusional ones who are actually in love. They have this hope bubbling deep down that one day this man will love them too, have this big 'aha' moment and leave "her". Do they think about the fact that if he indeed has his aha moment, one day they might be in the same position they ousted wifey from? This aha moment doesn't often happen, and if it does, it's highly unusual that she will get the happy ever after with him never having another aha moment.....see where i'm coming from here?
Smart women with common sense fall victim to this scenario too, because love is a funny thing, blissful even , just like it's cousin ignorance. and sometimes you love so hard you will be prepared to settle for whatever tidbit is thrown your way.....as long as you keep in mind that you might never get your aha.....you might be ok.


So depending on the category you might find yourself in, it seems to take a lot of different thinks to a matey make, strength, love, crazy, idiocy, naivety, boldfaceness (lol).

I can't claim to know why people get themselves into sticky situations, I just know that sometimes things are more complex than they appear on the surface. Like miss tanya says:
well if him wah stray
him will find a way
no matter how much you move like mange
cause if him leave me alone or me send him back home
and nutten inna you house no change
you know you still a go lose him
 
 
Don't get me wrong, I'm not here to condone the matey way of life, or to put the blame on anyone, not even Akon (and he requested it) and I'm not here to judge one way or the other. you women who have a man, sometimes you gotta check yourselves. I am not of the belief that someone can "steal" your man, he tends to go off willingly (even in a blackmail or threat to the family situation, he goes along willingly with the hope that nothing will  happen...he coulda just said "baby a crazy lady is stalking me" right). What I'm saying, is that just because you're happy and it's all hunky dory for you, sometimes , like when painting, you need to take a step back to actually see how the picture is coming along.

By no means do I think this "pon di side" situation is limited to men. Women creep all the time too..... but that creeper story is for another day.

Wednesday, 1 September 2010

closing the account

Question of the day:  Would you leave a social networking site for your SO (significant other)

My answer: UM NOOOO.

This question was posed as Facebook status, and the poster said that he would. His reasoning was that in relationships you have to compromise and also that he flirts on facebook and though it's harmless his SO may not "understand".


Ok, let me get this straight....you're on facebook/myspace/hi5, whatever and you get involved with someone. This someone gets a bit miffed that you "flirt" on whatever site and demands that you close your account. I have a few problems with this whole scenario.
First thing, you were already on the site when the new someone  came into your life, hell they're probably on the site too. Secondly, while I agree with compromise, this isn't a compromise, it's an ultimatum (CONTROL) hidden in a request that they will somehow manage to try to convince you (probably with emotional blackmail)  is the right thing to do. And third...if you or the someone can flirt online, chances are you can flirt everywhere else, so unless you're going to ban the person from having contact with anyone but you, deleting your account doesn't actually make sense.


I will not be giving up my social network for my SO, sorry if that's going to be a problem....until they make my beloved Farmville a stand alone game....any someone I eventually end up with (if ever) will just have to deal with it.

Sunday, 29 August 2010

goon too soon

Today is the 1st birthday after the 1st anniversary of the death of my all time favourite musical genius.... Michael Joseph Jackson.
They always die tragically and young don't they. You may not think of 51 as young, but he was young at heart. How's that? You ever think, the world just can't handle people like him...and that they can't handle the world around them either?
But we had years and a musical and philanthropic legacy to remember him by. I choose not to listen to idle chatterings about why he did whatever to himself and allegations. I wasn't there and money can be a powerful negotiator.
Right now I'm sad, not only because I think of his children and family and millions of fans and people he has touched around the world...but for the seemingly unimportant (as compared to) reason that I cannot find my Invincible CD. I opened the case to find nothing, not even an IOU. :( I had the urge to listen to "Butterflies" today. I'm now being made to listen via Youtube.... *sigh*

When going through his discography, I always find a song I love but have forgotten about, Right now I'm on the early classics with the J5. I'm on "Good Thing Going", mind you the Sugar Minott cover will always be a classic in it's own right, but I'm on a MJ vibe today.
"Understanding With never handing any alibis
Instead of what you do
Where you been or what's the use
We're making nice"
Just makes me think of a certain someone.  People, Imma say again how important it is to find someone you can be yourself with. If you find yourself making up stuff because what you say or feel 'won't sound right' to them....drop them like a hot potato. Then go out and get your own "My Little baby"

Michael made music for everyone. I can't see anyone not at least liking one track of his vast collection. The one song that makes me smile the most (not my favourite by far) is "With A Child's Heart" because I truly believe that this is the way he lived his life. Maybe more of us need to.


Anyway MJJ I love and miss you. I spent many a happy moment and will hopefully spend many more singing along (very badly I might add) to your music. When I have been very down in the past, there was always one of your songs there to comfort me and lift my spirits. I only hope the generations to come will come to love and respect your music and your imprint on the world. I value all the time I have spent with some members of your family, and from spending time and getting to know some of them, I can only imagine how bittersweet today is for them.

And for the rest of us. remember this:
Maybe you and I can't do great things
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today...
In our small way

Empty words are not enough
Where there's hurt we'll be a crutch
When there's thirst we'll fill each other's cup
Because we care we love enough to share

[Refrain]
Maybe you and I can't do great things
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today...
In our small way

In despair we'll be the hope
And the prayer that frees the soul
We'll be there to share each lonely road
Because we love, I know
We care enough

[Refrain]
Maybe you and I can't do great things
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today...
In our small way

Just a little time is all it takes
What a difference just a smile can make, you'll see
Love is all we need

[Refrain]
Maybe you and I can't do great things
We may not change the world in one day
But we still can change some things today...
In our small way