Saturday, 19 April 2008

Steups!

In April's issue of the premiere BLACK UK magazine there's a letter..the star letter of the month no less...written in response to an article written the month before about moving back to the West Indies.

Now I was reading along thinking 'oh this chick is making sense' it quickly turned into 'what the ass kinda fuckry is this dotish c*nt chatting?'.

She started off talking about how people think they can up and move to the Caribbean and it'll be all roses.. then she goes on to say that she doesn't think she could move to the island of her parent's origin because she couldn't deal with things like FLIRTATIOUS MEN, LONG LINES and HEAT. At this point a flag raises in my brain.

1. It was only when I moved here that I got a stalker..yes a stalker..he lived down my road and used to follow me and watch me and could tell me how nice I looked that day (that i never saw him) and where was I going.

2. Long lines are everywhere..yes the bank lines can get ridiculous but hell it's here too.

3. The heat....well to each his own


Right ok..I kept on reading. She goes on to add...and I quote "In England we are so proud to say that we are black, but in the Caribbean, people are happy to explain that they are mixed with Indian, Chinese and Portuguese, and it's even better if they are mixed with white"[end of quote].

Maybe I'm being overly sensitive but I found that statement insulting. Simply put my blood began to boil. Well that so pissed me off that I had to write a reply..whether they print it is another story.

1. What the hell does 'proud to be black' mean when this country is the king and queen of skin bleach creams....when you see children barely out of prams with weaves (yes weaves) and fake hair braids so tight that their hair line is already receding...when the darkest of females seek out white or light skinned men so their kids can have 'good hair'...proud to be black indeed.

2. I am MIXED!! Who looking at my will say that I'm black..except the white supremacist? If I'm out of the damn sun for more than 3 months I turn into a Casper colour. A while woman once accosted me in the middle of the West End ...I mean grabbed me with both hands and said 'you have white in you don't you!'..more of a statement than question. Yes I am black but I am also Carib, White and possibly a bit Portuguese (coming from the fact that I'm too lazy to check but people stop me and speak to me in Spanish, and that in Venezuela people thought I was Venezuelan). How does acknowledging the other aspects of heritage make me less proud of one?
The West Indian people are notoriously mixed because of colonisation and slavery it's in our blood..it's a part what we are..it's a part of who we are.


As much as I love freedom of speech I sometimes find that some people really need to be censored. Before they start babbling people need to realise that they are not brooks!

ps: that's not my response. lol

Monday, 14 April 2008

Creeps

I went out to a formal banquet on saturday night.I wasn't overly impressed at being placed at the top table but wah yuh go do. It was for a lodge..you know them they Masons or Carpenters..Star of Hope..Foresters etc. My cousin is the head of his chapter which is quite impressive given his age..he's the youngest president they've ever had. Anyway I don't particularly like the people in it. His mother is a member of two lodges and one is a little stingy the other I love..some of the ladies I don't care for but most are lovely older ladies who make sure and pack a container of food for me if they have any informal function that I don't attend...y'all know the way to my heart is through my belly...or well my feet..cause ya'll know I love me some shoes.
Anyway these people in this lodge have an attitude like they are better than everyone..which is odd since my poor easy going cousin is so not like that...So not only are they stuffy and hoity toity but they have some really uncouth guests. There's a guest speaker..wasn't a boring or long talk..and you're going to be having a big old chat during..not even quiet. Then again what did I expect from a female dressed like that. One in a too tight for her , very cheap looking black thing, the front thigh length the back calf length...fine for a club not for a formal dinner. I'm not Trinny and Susanna and this is not 'What Not To Wear' but jeeze..didn't she have a mirror. Then again dem does feel dey go find husband by these things.

On to the creep. This one man, the secretary of the lodge..decided that he was going to take a shine to me. So all night he was making some out of place comment. He came around with a bottle of El Dorado (15) and I commented that it seemed the factory was having issues because for the past 6 months there hasn't been any coming into the UK....this was his reply ''I know I bought 3 boxes and I brought one box here so if you want any there's only one place left for you to get it'...I'm like WTF. Now ya'll know my mouth ain't have no back door.However since it was my cousin's first run in he chair I decided to not make any friendly chat, cut him off nicely and let it slide. That obviously wasn't the way to go. A little later they were passing out presents..it was a 'ladies night' and all females received a little token...somehow he took it upon himself to be the one to distribute to our table..there were 2 ladies next to me and I was on the end..he gives them theirs, gets to me, pulls it back and says 'yours is at my house' by this time I'm speechless eh. Did I mention he leaning down to talk to me wid cigarette breath. UGH!!!! Later on in the night the music come on and people found their way to the likkle dance floor... I found my way back to my seat or up and down my table chatting to me family dem. Dude returns coming to ask me to dance I'm like um no thanks..he wants to know why I'm like because I'm enjoying my time relaxing and chatting..he says 'ok I'll give you a 5 minute grace period'.. WTF. Now I had already complained to my cousin who spoke to him.. obviously not hard enough.. Oh did I forget to mention this cretin is a big ole married man and his wife is sitting with him a table over from us....and he presented her with a huge bouquet of flowers in front of everyone...Now wtf..your wife right there and you still trying strokes on people girl chile. CREEP!